Post #19: The fragments of Carolyn Kay Steedman

 Word Count: 274

"I had learned to hold the past in an uneasy equipoise, neither disowning it, nor allowing it too much power over me. It was not that I had become reconciled to it, but that I had learned how to use it, and to make something else out of it, something not quite so heavy to bear."

Steedman explores the emotional and psychological impact of growing up in a working-class family in postwar England, examining the relationships between herself, her mother, and her siblings, and reflecting on the larger cultural and historical forces that shaped their lives. Throughout her childhood we get to see how others in her life were affected, especially her parents. The war had made them into versions of themselves they did not recognize. Steedman describes the complicated and frequently tense relationship she has with her mother with a mixture of love, frustration, and sadness. She examines how her mother's expectations and demands shaped her own sense of self as she considers the difficulties her mother faced as a working-class woman. Similarly, Steedman writes about her father with a mixture of admiration and indifference, describing him as a charismatic but ultimately flawed figure. She considers the effects of his drinking and his absence from the home, as well as the ways in which his exaggerated personality both drew her in and turned her away.

Steedman uses a fragmented and irregular narrative approach to bring together many lines of memory and analysis across the entire book. This method portrays her life in a vivid and engaging manner while highlighting the ways in which individual experiences are influenced by larger historical and cultural contexts.